With the start of a new year, it’s the perfect time to “go to the balcony” of our life’s journey and reflect on one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves: Am I living a fulfilling life? If not, what steps—both immediate and long-term—can I take to move in that direction?

In my book, The Journeyman Life: The Not-So-Perfect Path to a Life Well-Lived, I explore three critical stories that are present in all our lives:

1. The Persona Story: This is the answer to “Who are you?” People often describe themselves through their careers, relationships, or other outward aspects, representing the public identity they project to the world.
2. The Private Story: This story reflects our internal, less visible self—the aspects we keep private or share with only a select few.
3. The Unknown Story: Aspirational and future-focused, this story represents what’s possible for us and embodies our best intentions.

Our life’s work is to integrate, resolve, and align these stories to achieve greater fulfillment and integrity.

Let’s turn now to the second of the “threes” mentioned in the title: Three life perspectives. This concept comes from the research of Dr. Martin Seligman, often called the “father of Positive Psychology.” He outlines three ways we experience life:

1. A Life of Happiness: This is about finding joy and pleasure in life’s enjoyable moments. For example, a friend of mine finds immense happiness playing bridge, whether online or in person, which also offers social and mental benefits.
2. A Life of Fulfillment: This is about being fully engaged in activities that challenge and excite us. A friend of mine, a prolific writer in his 70s, continues to tackle new projects with enthusiasm, drawing deep satisfaction from his work.
3. A Life of Meaning: This involves contributing to something beyond ourselves. For example, a friend who is a retired executive is passionate about his volunteer work, leading fundraising efforts for a preschool in a disadvantaged community. Another friend finds purpose in helping his nearly blind, elderly neighbor with errands and doctor visits.

Seligman’s research shows that people who engage deeply in all three lives—happiness, fulfillment, and meaning—report far greater life satisfaction. Those who focus solely on fun or pleasure often find themselves feeling unfulfilled later in life. However, when joy is combined with engagement and purpose, it becomes the icing on the cake.

These concepts connect seamlessly with the three stories from The Journeyman Life. Resolving our internal narratives creates clarity and energy, allowing us to live expansively, focus on relationships, and contribute meaningfully to the world. This alignment transforms our perspective, enabling us to measure our lives by the positive impact we have on others while also experiencing the joy of feeling “used up” in the most fulfilling way.

To start improving your “fulfillment quotient,” Seligman recommends a simple yet powerful exercise: think of someone who has profoundly helped you in life, write a 300-word story about what they did for you, and then share it with them in person or over the phone. Research shows this small act of gratitude significantly boosts positive emotions for both the writer and the recipient, often lasting for months.

As we begin the new year, let’s align our stories and perspectives to create a life of joy, engagement, and meaning—a life well-lived.